We all need friends who encourage us
In stories, much as in life, the obstacles tend to make us forget. The challenges in life can feel so overwhelming that they become insurmountable in our minds.
So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing. (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
I love underdog stories. I’m not much of a sports movie fan (unless you count the Mighty Ducks franchise), but some of my favorite movie moments are the point of climactic action where the a coach or a mentor is reminding the players who they are and how far they’ve come and why they matter as individuals and as a team.
Without that speech, the team wouldn’t have been able to move forward. There are lots of moments in stories like that, where a character has to speak up to remind the protagonist why what they are doing matters. Because in stories, much as in life, the obstacles tend to make us forget. The challenges in life can feel so overwhelming that they become insurmountable in our minds.
And then, someone comes along and gently reminds us who we are in Christ. And just like that, we remember that there’s nothing that can stop us if we are operating in God’s will. And nothing can stand against us when we are living in God’s power.
While we usually think of people who support us in that way as coaches or mentors or pastors or leaders, there’s actually a better word for them: Encouragers.
No, being an encourager isn’t spouting warm-fuzzy, feel-good fluff. It’s not telling people what they want to hear. Being an encourager is telling people what is true, what they need to hear. And oftentimes, the role of encourager falls to the friends who love you.
To encourage someone is to give them courage. It’s to help them see what is real. It’s showing them that they don’t need to be controlled by their fears. It’s holding space to allow someone you love to be vulnerable with their anxieties but also not letting them stay there.
In the darkest moments of my life, my friends have sat beside me, speaking light and truth into me. They have reminded me that I am God’s daughter, that He never makes mistakes, that He always keeps His promises. Remembering that has given me the courage to face impossible circumstances with hope.
Granted, there are times when we need to hear warm-fuzzy things. We all need comfort at times, and that doesn’t make us wrong or weak or failures. There’s nothing wrong with that. But warm-fuzzy feelings aren’t going to help you much when you need a sword.
If you have friends in your life, look for opportunities to encourage them. The world is a scary place. It’s getting darker every day. God gave us friendship and community so that we wouldn’t have to face it alone, and so that we can equip each other to be victorious.
Questions for Reflection
How would you describe the difference between encouraging someone and comforting someone?
When was a time in your life when someone encouraged you?
How can you tell if a friend needs to be encouraged?
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